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My Place is Not in a Helicopter

14 Tuesday Jul 2015

Posted by Ann Kilter in Uncategorized

≈ 4 Comments

Will turned in his two week notice today.

His current employer then counter offered  twice his salary.

He had already sent in his acceptance to the new company.

His dad thinks he should keep his word and go with the new company.

On the other hand…

This is the young man who moved to a town 70 miles away by faith, tremulously hoping that the job would work out. Three years later different companies are offering him huge raises. He has shown himself to be a creative programmer.

He wanted me to help him decide. I gave him some input… I always lean toward security. But I told him the decision was up to him. Whatever he decides is fine with me. I’ll pray for him either way.

This helicopter has landed.

Kilter Family Update

28 Thursday Aug 2014

Posted by Ann Kilter in Uncategorized

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

change, independence, starting school, transition

This is the first fall since 1991 that the Kilter family does not have someone starting school. 23 years since school started for our family. And now, it’s over for us.

Mary is in a 15 week training program, but it started in July and will end in a certification test and possible job in a government call center. And Patty will be a teacher’s assistant at the college she graduated from this last spring. But she is not taking classes;she will be grading tests and taking attendance.

But no one is starting a program leading to a degree this year. No one. It feels foreign. Strange. Odd. I feel at loose ends.

983680_10152129219436381_3894192826668685186_n

No school buses. Although the only school buses our kids rode were special education buses. We didn’t have to deal with school bus woes.

buses

No tuition payments. Why am I not more flush with funds? Still recovering I think.

Wow. Just wow. Looks like this update is mostly about the end of one chapter, and the beginning of several others – the kids are going off in their own directions, and we, Ralph and I, have to think about our next chapter.

In other news, Will made it back from Tennessee just fine.

 

 

Things I would say to parents of kids with Cerebral Palsy

29 Thursday May 2014

Posted by Ann Kilter in Uncategorized

≈ 1 Comment

I was so moved by Nic’s wonderful advice to parents of children with cerebral palsy. I think much of it could apply to parents of autistic children. I hope you will enjoy it as much as I did.

viewfromawalkingframe

Let me kick this post off by saying that I know I am probably the least qualified person to be writing this – I’m not a parent, and I’ll be totally honest and say that, at present, I have no desire to be. I know this might change for me in future and if it does then that’s okay, but for now I think I’m far happier with the idea of getting to be the family friend that buys all the noisy, messy toys at Christmas. But anyway, I digress.

I’ve been toying with the idea or writing this post for a while, but I didn’t want to offend any parents by writing an ‘advice’ post when I can’t even imagine what it’s like to be in their position. I’m also not a medical professional; I’m just your average 23 year-old who happens to have Cerebral Palsy herself. I know…

View original post 898 more words

Link

Love and Logic

26 Sunday Jan 2014

Posted by Ann Kilter in Uncategorized

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Love and Logic, parenting manual, parenting special needs kids

Love and Logic

Love and Logic was recommended to me many years ago by a Social Worker on my children’s therapy team.

I was reminded of this series of books when reading a blog – Life on the “J” Train, http://lifeonthejtrain.wordpress.com/2014/01/24/lets-call-this-one-cookie/ – She said she needed some sort of parenting manual. I remember throwing away or giving away the manuals that were meant for “normal” children, since all of mine were in special education.

Love and Logic meant letting logical consequences occur.

So when our youngest daughter was causing everyone to be late for school morning after morning, I told her that it was obvious that she needed more time to get ready for school. So every morning that we were late getting out of the door due to her slow movements, I told her she would be getting up fifteen minutes earlier than everyone else. She ended up getting up an hour earlier by the time it began to make sense to her.

Sometimes it meant appealing to Will’s sense of logic rather than arguing, cajoling, pleading, or getting mad when he didn’t see the point of taking a shower before school. One morning I said to Will, “You know, civilized people take showers every day.” It made sense to him at just the moment. It was a moment of inspiration out of the blue.

We went to church more than once without shoes, or with a child in pajamas.

I recommend this book to other parents of kids with special needs. It didn’t work all the time. Love and Logic was one of many strategies we employed in raising our kids.

Lessons from the Community of Disability

08 Monday Jul 2013

Posted by Ann Kilter in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

There is a lot of wisdom here.

http://sheepdogger.blogspot.ca/2012/02/7-lessons-from-community-of-disability.html

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