“A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for.” John Shedd.
My blog posts have slowed down this year. This is due in part to the chaos in my life due to Ralph’s health issues. I just haven’t had the time or energy to devote to writing.
It may also be due to the fact that our kids are leaving the nest and moving on with their lives. I am in the process of letting go, and I feel a need to allow them more privacy.
I’ve received some more reminders lately that the ropes are being cast off and their ships are sailing out of the harbor.
I struggle with the idea of them dating, making decisions with the tag – “just letting you know, Mom….” As if I have no say in the matter! 🙂
They were all home for Christmas and it was wonderful. We enjoyed our turkey dinner. We watched It’s A Wonderful Life. On Christmas morning we turned on the Yule Log movie on Netflix.
Mary’s gift to us was rebuilding my old computer so that I could do my writing and Ralph could play games. Will gave us a new monitor to go with it. Patty gave us a gift card to Olive Garden. They know how to give good gifts…
We talked about going to see the Star Wars movie at the movie theater over New Year’s weekend while visiting Will at his house. Will let me know later in the day that he was planning to see us in February around his birthday. He had plans for another date on New Year’s with a girl he has been chatting with on-line for a while.
While home from University, Patty told me that she was planning to apply for a job at a national historical site, and that if she gets the job, she would not be staying with us this summer. Just letting us know, not asking our opinion, she said.
Mary is planning to live with us for a few more years and save up to buy a condo or a small house. Ralph is recommending a house with paid maintenance. My preference is that she buy a condo. But it is up to her, and she has to make up her own mind. She has been working full time for almost a year.
Ralph is continuing to recover his health, but has had some set backs. He is doing the emotional work of adjusting to disability and retirement. Everything is different for him. He is struggling with loneliness and finding a sense of purpose. I make suggestions, but he told me that he is still recovering and he doesn’t have the energy to take up something new right now.
As for me, I feel a bit at loose ends. Things are changing for me, too. My relationships with my husband and children are different. I probably won’t write about the process. Some of it is exciting. Some, not so much. After a year’s absence, I am planning to get involved with my writing group again. I am thinking about trying my hand at writing some fiction. I have a couple of ideas. I may start a different blog, not related to autism. Having a working computer in my writing corner is a big help.
Thank you all for going on this journey with me.
Ann, your post today brings tears to my eyes and spirit. I am in a similar spot as you. After years and years of being intensely involved – emotionally, physically, mentally, spiritually – with our children (especially those ones with special needs), it is with a mixed bag of emotions that we let go, again. So very glad and elated that they are making these strides in independence and living lives of their own. So difficult to wonder how the day to day decisions they make will effect their eventual happiness.
Thank you for allowing many of us to take this journey with you. God bless you, keep you, and make His face shine upon you and those you love.
Lilka Raphael said:
Yours was one of the first blogs I read and followed when I started on WordPress. I really believe it was Spirit led. Your blog has inspired me these past two plus years like none other. You have been so forthcoming with both challenges and achievements that it gave me hope to see possibilities I hadn’t dreamed of before.
As you now walk down a new path I pray God’s favor for you and your family. Your words, I’m sure, have inspired more than myself. You have kept your family not only together but moving forward.
Well done! May your next chapter be an enjoyable adventure. 🙂
the jay train said:
Oh how I have loved reading all your posts. And I miss them when they come few and far between but I understand. 🙂 I hope whatever comes next brings you lots of happiness.
Wishing you absolutely the best, have loved reading your story!